Reminders

It's funny. Sometimes I see things, hear things or read things that remind me that I am at such an early stage in my medical training. I've read some good blogs from doctors and students alike, that serve to freak me the hell out sufficiently to want to know more, and make me wonder if I'm cut out for it. And then there are other events... I saw a fellow student, looking mildly shell shocked after performing his first DRE. Groan... enough said. I hope I'm an alright doctor...

Meanwhile, I have some fun. The editor of Placebo was sufficiently desperate, that I was asked to submit something. So here you are, feel free to have an advanced copy.

How to be a stand out performer in PBL.
So you’ve made it to medical school! You’ve got the stethoscope your family gave you as a congratulatory present draped comfortably around your neck, and you’re ready to get down and do some pseudo-doctoring!

But easy there Tiger. Before you get down to saving some lives, you’ve got to go through this PBL lark. The rite of passage for all Flinders Medical Students. The mandatory mode of learning you waxed lyrically about in your interview. Remember, PBL is a fun educational tool, that will serve you well. And if you don’t like it, than at least attend to demonstrate that you know the significant difference between palpating the perineum and the peritoneum*. Or that Military tuberculosis is actually spelled and pronounced, Miliary Tuberculosis*

So having surveyed a few comrades, we’ve compiled a list of seven sterling tips, that will help you stand out in your PBL like the flower in a pot of dirt you’ve always known you are.

1. Always be condescending. Remember, dismissing other peoples ideas out of hand is a good way to educate others, whilst showing how smart you are!
2. Begin all anecdotes with “In my experience.” This will add weight to your absence of experience and knowledge.
3. Arrive late. Whilst the rest of the suckers might get there early and draw diagrams, your vast experience and laissez-faire attitude will allow you to arrive fashionably late. Twenty minutes is optimal, as your group will politely wait the first ten, allowing you to skip the recap and proceed straight to teaching your group new things.
4. Forget PBL food. Remember, a hungry PBL group is a focused PBL group. Time spent munching can better be spent on the Kreb’s cycle.
5. Use permanent marker. White board markers are for wusses. What you put on the board is gold, and should be remembered for the ages.
6. Claim other groups’ work. Did the previous group forgot to wipe the whiteboard? No problem! You were only going to put the same Guyton diagram up as the previous group anyway, right?
7. Pick a fight with the tutor. Just because they have a medical degree or a Ph.D in the area, doesn’t make that story you read in Woman’s Weekly while you were getting your hair done completely wrong.

By never doing any of these things you’ll be greatly loved by classmates and tutors alike. In fact, recent research has shown that the only thing that can make you more popular is hooking up with your classmates and tutors alike! But if you don’t like to defecate where you masticate relationship-wise, listening, discussing and being a constructive part of your PBL group will see you become an outstanding medical student.

* True stories!

I also hope to be a better doctor than author...